I’ve seen these kinds of debates with quite a bit of my own friends before. The lengths that people go to to avoid awkward conversations are usually just a matter of personal preference…and I’m not saying that I’m an arrogant ass, but I have trouble listening to people when they won’t talk at length.
I think the problem is that people who are very comfortable talking at length are usually afraid to talk at all, and often end up sounding like they’re talking to themselves. Which is fine, but it’s also not a good idea to be discussing too much of a topic.
The lengths that people go to to avoid awkward conversations are usually just a matter of personal preference. I can imagine it to be like those guys who sit around in a small room eating their food with chopsticks and talking about how the food tastes. There is usually a big difference between the conversation and the food, and people who eat their food with chopsticks are basically talking about how tasty the food is and not about how they feel about the topic being discussed.
The same is true of relationships. When someone talks about how he or she doesn’t feel comfortable at a party, it’s not because they don’t like the party. It’s because they don’t like the topic being discussed. Similarly, if someone wants to talk about how bad a situation is, there’s no need to talk about the topic being discussed. You can go on about how it’s bad, but there are other things that are equally important.
It’s not just the topic, it’s the topic and its topic. It’s the topic itself that should be the topic, not the person who brings it up. If you want to get your friends and/or family to talk about how they are feeling, then they should be the ones who bring it up. If you want to get someone to talk about how they feel about a topic, then you should be the one who brings it up and put the topic in the conversation.
The point here is that both length and tension should be considered when it comes to speaking about a topic. It is no longer enough to simply say, “Hey, I have a very long and very tense relationship with my girlfriend.” It is too easy to slip into saying things that come off as sarcastic or over dramatic, and this makes it harder for people to truly open up and talk about their feelings.
Another thing about length and tension is that they are often inversely related. If you want to build a relationship with someone, it’s easier to talk about their length rather than their tension. And that’s why it is absolutely necessary to maintain a level of self-awareness and self-awareness of the other person’s needs and demands.
It might be harder to build a relationship with someone if you don’t really know the other person’s needs or demands, but that’s a different conversation, one that I won’t be able to have with you.
This is a good point, especially if your goal is to build a relationship. If you dont know the other person, you dont know what the other person needs or wants, so it can be harder to build a relationship. But if you think, “If he can’t handle this, that means he doesn’t really want the relationship,” you might be in a better place to start building it.
The fact is that our expectations of others are often different. If we’re always looking at each other to figure out the other person’s “needs”, it can be hard to understand the other person. There have been several times in my life when I’ve been in a position where I didn’t understand what the other person was feeling and how I could help.
